Finding the Words

By Terrye Cheathem

In 2007 I decided to start a greeting card company aimed at people in prison. I called it Three Squares Greetings, after the three square meals a day prisons serve inmates.

The seed for this idea was planted six years earlier, when my brother-in-law was arrested. At the time, he was unemployed and it was his first arrest. It took only one bad decision to result in a felony charge. The court sentenced him to approximately 13 months in prison.

It was 2000, and I had been practicing law for eleven years, but I had never practiced criminal law. However, I did have direct contact with what was then the largest jail in the world?the Los Angeles County Jail. As an attorney in the Office of the County Counsel for Los Angeles I was assigned to work as one of the sheriff's legal advisors. In that capacity I learned that inmates send and receive large quantities of mail, including greeting cards.

My sister told me that my brother-in-law wrote her many letters, and that year he sent me a Christmas card from prison. In June 2001, a few weeks before his birthday, my sister encouraged me to send him a birthday card. "He always asks about you," she said. At first I scoffed at the idea, because I was less than happy with him for dragging my sister and our family into his downward spiral. But I finally relented and visited my local stationery store in search of a suitable birthday card. None of them were appropriate for someone serving time, because all were far too celebratory. A birthday spent behind bars is anything but a happy one. I finally settled on the most sedate birthday card I could find.

That shopping experience was both incredibly challenging and somewhat depressing. I'd always assumed that there was a greeting card for every occasion.

So, over the summer, I feverishly began writing greeting cards for prisoners for all occasions because, believe it or not, inmates still celebrate birthdays, Christmas, and every other holiday. I also ran the idea past my family and friends. Their response was overwhelmingly positive.

I debuted my cards at a local book fair at Leimert Park in Los Angeles, where I was the only greeting card vendor. Many people perused the cards, which had messages like: "Do you know how many people care about you? A few of us signed this card." Or, "I've been very disappointed with your choices. But, I have not given up on you."

Many of the people who purchased cards surprised me with their willingness to share personal stories about a father, husband, brother, or son who'd been sent away. One young woman told me that her father had been in prison for several years for a sex offense. She hadn't communicated with him because she didn't know what to say. Another woman revealed that her brother was serving a 25-years-to-life sentence in another state. He had told their parents that he thought she'd forgotten about him because she never wrote.

The goal of my business is to give words to the many mixed emotions felt by those closest to the 2.5 million inmates currently in prison across the United States. After all, what is the appropriate sentiment to send someone who is serving a long sentence? What is the best birthday greeting for someone who may never come home? Though people may still love the incarcerated person, feelings of hurt, embarrassment, shame, and fear tend to rise to the surface.

I presently practice employment law part time and spend the rest of my time expanding my greeting card business. (But I look forward to resuming a full-time practice soon.) I've recently added a line of cards called "Inside/Out," which I created for inmates to send to their friends and family on the outside. The cards are sold in prison commissaries and canteens, and their messages range from, "I've disappointed you too many times. For that, I apologize. I'm trying to get myself together in here," to a Mother's Day card that reads, "I'm sorry that I can't give you flowers in person today. I don't know how and I don't know when, but I will make this up to you."

As for my brother-in-law, after being released he found full-time employment and has not been arrested again. In spite of his temporary setback, we remain a close-knit family.

Terrye Cheathem is a Los Angeles?based employment attorney.

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